Over the past 2 years, my boys have grown and changed dramatically. I have such an affinity toward them and LOVE taking them out on outings with their amazing mother. The other night while talking to my roommate, we came to the agreement that this family is one of the greatest things in Jordan. Since the passing of my Teta, this little family has been a constant that has made my time here so enriched and grounded. Without them, I know that I would feel more lonely. Before returning to Jordan in May, I was very concerned that much of my time in Jordan would be consumed by depression and memories. My first week I was almost constantly in tears. I try to embrace the memories as frequently as possible with a smile, but when I miss her badly enough I still can't help but cry. It's devastating to me that she is gone, but it would be worse to have those sweet memories taken from me. Thank you to everyone who has made Jordan so welcoming and lovely this summer. I have many kind faces that keep me coming and I am very grateful for the family members and friendships that I have here.
I think one of the simplest but most telling times are our Abu-Majdi runs. As we cross the street and scamper up the hill, it is apparent that I am quite possibly the worst guardian in the world. As soon as we enter the shop, the boys immediately snatch up anything that could be deemed unhealthy and ask me to purchase it. My response is always a scold and an eyebrow raise because they know that all they'll ever get from me is ice cream, fruit, real juice and sugar-free trident. (Due to my lack of an oven, I have completely given up cooking all together and have assumed a lovely juice and fruit diet. Healthy? Heavens no. Delicious and slimming? Yes!) The heat is so penetrating in my apartment and in the streets that food has lost its savor and I fathom eating anything that is not freezing and refreshing.
If I read glances correctly, people often say, "wow, she's a demanding momma!" In public, I make my boys behave and at home, all rules go out the window.